Back to Borneo

I’ve flown into Kuching, the capital of Sarawak, right at the south-western tip of the state, from Singapore. My main goal, this trip, is Pitcairn Island, in the Pacific, but it's a very long way and I wanted to do some exploring en route. This is my third visit to Borneo, the third largest island in the world. (That means it’s huge.) Most of it is owned by Indonesia and known as Kalimantan. There’s a ragged, roughly diagonal, border and the north west corner is occupied by Sarawak and Sabah states in Malaysia and the microstate of Brunei. I’ve already been to Sabah and Brunei. The time has come to take in some of the remainder.

Kuching, Sarawak - in a Nutshell

• The earliest known human settlement in Sarawak at the Niah Caves dates back 40,000 years. A series of Chinese ceramics dated from the 8th to 13th century AD was uncovered at the archaeological site of Santubong. The coastal regions of Sarawak came under the influence of the Bruneian Empire in the sixteenth century.
• Kuching was actually the third capital of Sarawak, part of the Brunei Empire until 1827. But the Sultan of Brunei handed Sarawak over to British explorer, James Brooke, after he assisted him in crushing a rebellion. According to the Malaysians he regretted this decision bitterly, as more and more of Brunei defected to Brookes, in return for protection and development. Eventually, Sarawak became considerably larger than Brunei.
• In 1841, Kuching became the capital of Sarawak and James Brooke became the first White Rajah. His nephew, Charles Brookes, became the second White Rajah, effectively developing the city’s infrastructure, with a welcome sanitation system, hospital, prison, fort, and bazaar. After World War II and the Japanese occupation, the last Rajah of Sarawak, Charles Brooke’s son, Sir Charles Vyner Brooke, decided to hand over Sarawak to the British Crown, in 1946. The action wasn’t well received by many of the locals.
• However, Kuching remained the capital during the British Crown period and, following on from that, capital of the state, when Sarawak was integrated into the Federation of Malaysia, in 1963.
• The state government system is closely modelled on the Westminster parliamentary system and the head of state is the governor. Under the Malaysian constitution, Sarawak has greater autonomy than the states in Peninsular Malaysia.
• Malay is the official language of the state and there is no official religion. Sarawak is the only state of Malaysia with a Christian majority. It has plenty of Tao temples, too.

Colourful Kuching, the Capital of Sarawak

Kuching is an unexpectedly delightful city. It’s nestling on my favourites list. For the moment. It spreads south from the Sarawak River. Here, and in this area, are the old colonial buildings, like the courthouse, two forts (a small fort house, the Square Tower and Fort Margherita, built to deter pirates), the Astana Palace, (a wedding gift for the second rajah’s wife and now the governor’s residence), the Floating Mosque and the cultural museum are found. Though these have been superseded and, the Malaysians would say, surpassed, by modernity. A huge new Borneo Cultures Museum, the second largest in South Asia, a fantastically intricate and illuminated State Legislative House and several bridges. A twisty S for Sarawak footbridge is only really any use for sightseeing, but it’s a good view.

I’m also taking in the riverside attractions from one of the evening cruise boats. We glide past the stilt villages and fishing boats, incongruously the foreground for towering hotels. The Hilton is a snowy white monolith. Just in case that’s not enough entertainment, there’s Sarawak tribal dancing on board. And squash and cakes are paraded from the servery.

Every evening, there’s a fountain laser show beneath the bridge and legislative building. It’s decorative, if not quite the Bellagio. And I can see it from my bedroom window. Well, partially. There’s an old warehouse in the way. Strings of bright neon lights also festoon the trees and hang across the road here. It’s Christmas all year round.

The Ranee Hotel Suites

I have mainly good things to say about my hotel too. It’s beautifully appointed (as an estate agent would say), properly boutique, with a luggage and travel theme. Wooden shutters and floors, tin ornaments and old cases, sprinkled artistically and a perfect location, by the river. I just think the breakfasts are a bit stingy. Brown or white bread for toast, a couple of unappetising plates of melon and orange concentrate, when there’s a juice bar on the premises.

Chinatown - a Purr-fect Place

The hotel is in the heart of Chinatown, full of small quirky shops, symmetrical, mini-palace-style Tao temples and little open fronted restaurants. Delicious smells emanate from those. Roast duck, intermingled with perfumes and soaps. Semi-pedestrianised streets, demarcated with the familiar dragon gates and strings of scarlet lanterns.

There’s a kilometre long riverside promenade, with views of all the bridges and forts, compact cafes and benches dotted around. But the section of the riverfront road, where I am based, is actually called The Bazaar. The stalls here cater mostly for tourists, with racks of clothes, cakes and crafts. They extend warren-like, deep inside and spill over onto the pavement, in turn separated by arcades. At times, the pavement disappears entirely. It’s a clever way to create a souk.

Chinatown is a great wander, right through to City Hall. Another flower shaped extravaganza, but older and dirtier than the legislative hall. ‘Welcome Cat’ statues abound. (Well, Kuching is Malay for cat. Perhaps that's why it's such a purr-fect place?) Some of them have uniforms, which change with the season, or the festival. There are four, waving goodbye, at one end of Chinatown. Though guide Antoni tells me there are several Chinatowns. Google begs to differ.

There’s also an Indian pedestrian shopping street, just beyond Chinatown and the old courthouse. The scent of spices fills the air here. Nearby are the gold domes of the old city mosque. It’s been replaced too, with a ten times the former capacity version.

Eating in Kuching

I’ve eaten lunch with guide Antoni, in a couple of street diners. The fare is generally the same. Fried rice or noodles with odd vegetables like bitter gourd (it really is bitter) and chunks of cold meat pork, or battered chicken.

I’m struggling to get used to the combination, so I’ve tried an upmarket restaurant, called Bla bla bla, for dinner. The food is delicious. Especially the prawns smothered in cashew sauce. But I’ve wildly over ordered. I hope they’ll give me a doggy bag. Though I’m not sure how they’ll manage with shredded duck, in sauce, balanced on slices of mango on spoons. It was enough of a challenge trying to work out how to eat it. Definitely too large for a mouthful, but defying all attempts to cut it in half, with a spoon or chopsticks. The prawns are also difficult. Shell on, so I too end up smothered. Fortunately, there’s a basket of napkins on the shelf above me. The lychee vodka is sublime.

Annah Rais, Sarawak

An hour and a half’s drive north, with Antoni, takes me to the traditional longhouse complex, which is Annah Rais. It’s actually three longhouses, dating back to 1818, though it’s difficult to discern the shape of them, as the buildings run into each other. A window into authentic indigenous life. Bamboo flooring leads us through the shops, homestays, cafes and private homes. In places, it’s been replaced by metal, as has most of the palm thatch.

It’s quiet today. It’s still early and the locals are all preparing for their Bring the Rice in Harvest Festival, this weekend. and, indeed, rice is being raked to dry. They usually party for one week before, and one week after, the day itself.

A separate room, in one longhouse, showcases the head-hunters’ trophies. Skulls in a cage. These were Bedayuh warriors. (A subgroup of the Dayak.) Antoni is proud to belong to this tribe. He confides that he would not be happy to visit an Iban home. (Another Dayak subgroup.) He fancies himself as a lady’s man, gap-toothed smile and pot-belly notwithstanding and talks constantly about his girlfriends past and present, all round the world. Cats abound here too. But these are real ones, all looking content and in good condition. There can’t be many mice left.

Bako National Park, Sarawak

Driving in Sarawak is an experience. There are good roads and traffic lights. But these are superfluous. If there’s nothing turning in, the traffic keeps flowing, even though the lights are red. We're on our way to the must-do expedition here, according to all the tour companies, the national park, at Bako. The area is famous for the endemic Borneo proboscis monkey, bearded pigs, other mammals, tropical birds and miniature green vipers. But, it’s not a great day for this type of endeavour. It’s raining heavily. And the boat trip from the terminal, round the peninsula, to the park, is not at all scenic or remotely pleasant. We’re buffeted by wind and rain the whole way, as the boat bangs hard, over the waves.

My other concerns, that the wildlife might not be too keen on venturing out in this weather, appear to be justified. The green vipers are all in hiding. There are trails, slippy and treacherous, but it seems that the animals, when they do appear, generally hang around the park headquarters and accommodation blocks. They’ve learned where the food is.

And the bearded pigs do saunter round here, snuffling. Mischievous macaques leap nimbly onto the roofs, faces peering over the eaves, as they watch for any opportunity to seize edibles, or rifle through belongings, or rubbish bins. You leave doors open at your peril. The guides wander around, trails of weary tourists in their wake, communicating on their walkie talkies, in the hope of spotting a target. A colugo with its pop-eyed baby causes some excitement. This so-called flying lemur does not fly and it’s not a lemur. It glides, using the skin flaps between its limbs. But it’s not commonly seen and the baby, peeping out of the pouch, formed by the loose folds of this membranes, is very cute.

After that excitement, we are diverted twice, to see juvenile male proboscis monkeys, who have disappeared, by the time we arrive. Finally, a solitary proboscis monkey makes an appearance, shimmies up a tree, to escape from all the excitement he’s caused and slings his legs above his head, creating a hammock for his head. Then, he slumbers. He definitely has a very big nose. (read more about proboscis monkeys here, under Kalimantan, Indonesia.)

Antoni's Antics

Sadly Antoni declines to speak to me all the way back to the city. He has nagged and nagged me about protecting my camera, even though I had followed his instructions assiduously and, in the end, I asked him to stop lecturing me. That was the end of the conversation.

He’s still not speaking to me when he arrives to take me to the airport next morning. It’s ‘Good morning’, and then more sulky silence. Well at least I don’t have to tip him.

Onwards, to Indonesia

Though the saving is wiped out at the check-in counter. Air Asia’s scales miraculously put me almost three kilograms over the 20 kilograms limit. Despite the fact the same bag and contents weighed 19 kilograms, at Heathrow. Two heavies with berets on stand by the gate entrance amidst the usual queues and bedlam. They seize on me of course. I’m the only blonde within miles. But my weak French gets me through the interrogation. For some reason.

Once on the plane, I’ve settled into my front row extra leg room seat. That’s a matter of debate. There’s a very large lady sitting next to me. I definitely can’t get out without clambering over her. I’m on my way to southern Borneo now, and Kalimantan. But there’s no direct route. Jakarta, here I come.

(Or read more about Malaysia here.)

New Seven Wonders - Cities

Recently, I've been obsessed with bucket lists and whether or not I agree with the findings of votes (or committees) who decide what goes on these rolls of honour. When I was looking at The Seven Wonders of the World, the 'New Seven Wonders - Cities' list caught my attention. The Swiss Foundation managed vote suggested: Durban, South Africa, Vigan (Philippines), Havana (Cuba), Kuala Lumpur (Malaysia), Beirut (Lebanon), Doha (Qatar), La Paz (Bolivia).

This is a weird and eclectic collection. Maybe it's designed to be alternative. They're all interesting cities. Well, nearly all. Durban I just don't get. Nice beaches, theme parks and a lot of crime. Though it has been renovated, since I was there, in 2003. Give me Cape Town any time. Vigan's a gorgeous colonial city, but there are plenty of those, especially in Latin America. I'm not sure it stands out.

Havana has colonial architecture and more modern communist era buildings. And that mid last century vibe. La Paz: witch's market, colonial architecture and that wonderful gondola transport system. Beirut: 'The 'Paris of the East', a mix of religious buildings, pavement cafes and a pretty corniche. But lots of renovation, still ongoing, to repair war damage. Doha - ultra modern, with a tiny old souq and falconry area. I'll take Abu Dhabi instead. (Dubai is too large and artificial.) Kuala Lumpur, again a mix of colonial and modern. But, it's not my favourite Asian city.

What criteria do you use to choose a favourite (or Bucket List) city? I suppose for me its a mixture of beauty - aesthetic appeal, general vibe, interesting things to do and see (galleries, unusual buildings, monuments, sculptures, living history and lovely things to eat.

Here's my list. There's no way I can stick to just seven, so I've come up with a cunning plan. I'm going to incorporate the latest fashion for dupes, or duplicates (usually at lower cost). The idea annoys me instantly, of course, Not least as it's a silly word which implies you've fallen for some con trick. No place has a duplicate. But some are more similar than others...

Beautiful Cities - Venice

Let's start with beauty. It might be a cliche, but it has to be Venice. It wasn't love at first time. The first visit was classically crowded and smelly. But the second time I went, in the Time of Covid, Venice was bereft of tourists. I actually got to see what the city looked like. It was utterly gorgeous, sublime, despite the ghoulish Don't Look Now images, which intrude, as I wander the canals. There's absolutely no duplicate for Venice, but there's always Florence (or Bologna, or Milan, or the cities of Sicily. Not to mention Rome.

Feasts of European Architecture - Vienna (Budapest and Prague)

Staying with European cities which are historically and architecturally interesting. All of the European capitals (and many other cities, such as Munich) warrant a visit. but three cities on rivers stand out here, the first two, on the Danube. It's hard to beat Vienna, the capital of Austria, if you like somewhere stylish to wander around. Baroque buildings, palaces, museums and gardens to admire, The Prater Park (Harry Lime on the wheel) and a plethora of coffee shops. And nip up the Danube, in a boat, to Bratislava, a pocket city that's a mini Vienna, just over the border, in Slovakia. Two for the price of one.

Further east on the Danube, Budapest, capital of Hungary, makes for a great stay, with the old and new cities, again plenty of interesting architecture, (Disneyesque crenellations), vibrant edgy quarters and lovely food.

Prague, capital of Czechia, is closer to Bratislava (for some time they were in the same country) but it's on the Vltava River. The waterway divides the city, as it does in Budapest and again it's a veritable feast of architecture, right through to modern day and The Dancing House, castles, museums and eateries.

Colonial Cities - Cartagena, (St Louis, Granada, Antigua, Willemstad)

Further afield, but still with architecture, it's generally the Spanish colonial cities, which delight the eye. Cartagena in Colombia, has to take the crown. But sadly it's on the cruise circuit and the streets are too often too crowded to properly enjoy. Otherwise, head to Latin America. Granada, in Nicaragua is gorgeous (thrown in Leon too), Antigua in Guatemala (not the island) is another strong contender (go during Easter week for the celebrations and carpets of flowers). I've already mentioned Havana and Vigan.

French colonial atmosphere - try the Caribbean or Vietnam. But it's strong in Africa, perhaps most notable in Saint Louis, in Senegal, the old capital of French West Africa. It's a satisfying contrast, to the bush and rainforest, with its shabby chic and overflowing markets. My other pick is Willemstad, in Curacao, for its (almost toy town) clusters of bright pastel painted Dutch colonial houses.

All of these cities are on the UNESCO World Heritage list, except for Granada, which has been hovering on the tentative list, since 2003

Culturally Enchanting Cities - Samarkand (Esfahan, Varanasi, Fez)

Cities which draw you into their culture through their beauty and ambience are perhaps my favourite. I've chosen Samarkand, in Uzbekistan. The Registan ensemble of Islamic buildings is an absolute must see. It's also home to other glorious mosques and complexes, as well as ancient Samarkand. (Don't miss Bukhara and Khiva while you're there.)

Esfahan, in Iran, offers a very different Islamic experience, with its souks, palaces, squares and amazing domes. Fez, in Morocco, has one of the most authentic and winding souks in the Arab world, though the sour smell (some would say stink), in the world renowned tanneries may prevent you from staying in that section overlong.

For an unforgettable spiritual experience, then it's Varanasi. Like much of India, it's uncomfortably crowded, dirty and overwhelming at times. But take a boat trip on the Ganges, watch the hugely spiritual cremation ceremonies on the ghats, take in the astonishing light, at dawn or dusk, and listen to the inspiring music.

Cities With Beautiful Settings - Cape Town, (Sydney, Rio de Janeiro, Vancouver, San Francisco, Tel Aviv)

CIties voted to have the most beautiful setting almost inevitably have natural harbours. Cape Town, South Africa, Sydney, Australia, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, Vancouver, Canada, and San Francisco, U.S.A, all qualify here. And they all regularly feature on best city lists and best places in the world to live.

Except for maybe Cape Town, as South Africa still has a reputation for crime and violence. But I'm still going to make it my number one. The beaches are gorgeous, the food and architecture are great, there's a huge amount to see in the vicinity, from wildlife to wine estates, the view of the Twelve Apostles backdrop is stunning and Table Mountain is iconic, from above, or below.

I'm also going to sneak in Tel Aviv-Yafo. It may not have the same mountain scenery, and only a small harbour, but The Big Orange, in Israel, has a long string of lovely beaches, the old city at Yafo (Jaffa) and plenty of cafes, museums and an extraordinary amount of Bauhaus architecture, in The White City area, to explore.

Mega Cities - New York (Chicago, Buenos Aires, Istanbul, Singapore)

And then there are the mega cities, the ones which offer history, diversity and an endless list of sights and experiences and one visit just won't do. New York often tops best city in the world lists for good reason. We get to interact with all those landmarks we've seen on TV. And there are some great panoramas and fabulous restaurants. Though I've never rated the shopping.

Chicago is another close contender, with its 1930s vibe. Further south, Buenos Aires is another city you can walk for days, taking in the barrios from up market Palermo to La Boca, home of the tango.

Istanbul is mostly in Europe (it's the largest city of that continent), but it spills over the Bosphorus into Asia, making it unique and exciting. And Singapore, the city state, which continually reinvents itself: China Town, Little India, The Bay Gardens. It's one huge theme park. I'm not sure if I like it, but there's plenty to do.

The City That Has it All - London

So many contenders. Ghent, in Belgium, some of the Dutch cities. I really wanted to include Lisbon (and Porto). You may have noticed that I've missed out Paris. It's undoubtedly a lovely city, in parts, but its also very one dimensional and urban. Romantic? I'm not sure. And I've never had a good meal there. I think it's had very good PR.

But one city has to get the final mention and that's London. The place of my birth frequently tops polls for best city in the world, and with reason. It's historic, once the largest city on earth, vibrant, hugely diverse, both in terms of population and architecture and city areas. The food is great (if expensive) and you never run out of new things to see and do. And, apologies, that makes eight.

What would your Cities of the World Bucket List be?

A Very Brief History of Malaysia

• Malaysia was ruled by various Malay kingdoms, until it became subject to the British Empire, from the eighteenth century on.
• Peninsular Malaya was restructured as the Federation of Malaya, in 1948, and achieved independence on 31 August 1957.
• The independent Malaya united with the then British crown colonies of North Borneo (Sabah), Sarawak, and Singapore, on 16 September 1963, to become Malaysia.
• In August 1965, Singapore was expelled from the federation and became a separate independent country.
• The ruling political coalition, Barisan Nasional, has been in power for more than 50 years.

Facts and Factoids

• Malaysia is a federal connotational monarchy, divided into two regions: Peninsular Malaysia and Borneo's East Malaysia. These are subdivided into thirteen states and three federal territories.
• Malaysia is a kingdom, but has a unique system, where the king is elected every five years from one of the nine existing royal families.
• The Name Malaysia means 'Land of the Malays', but in fact this is a very diverse population. About half the population is ethnically Malay, with minorities of Chinese, Indians, and indigenous peoples.
• The country's official language is Malaysian Malay, whilst many people also speak English.
• The currency of Malaysia is the Ringgit. The word ringgit means "jagged" in Malay, which refers to the jagged edges of Spanish silver dollars that were once used in the region.

• Malaysia is one of 17 megadiverse countries on Earth. It is estimated that Malaysia contains 20% of the world's animal species. These include the orang utan. These apes can only be found, in the wild, here and in Indonesia.
• It's not only the fauna that are diverse. Malaysia is home to the rafflesia, which has the largest flower in the world. It stinks. I can vouch for this - they grew one at Kew Gardens.
• The Malaysian flag consists of 14 red and white alternating stripes, which represent the 14 states in the country, along with a crescent and 14-point star. The yellow crescent represents Islam, the official religion of the country, while the star symbolises the unity among the states here. It was designed for a competition.
• Malaysia has numerous traditional (and delicious) foods, but the national dish is Nasi Lemak - fragrant rice which is cooked in coconut milk with pandan leaf.
• The main exports are are rubber, palm oil, and cocoa. Tea is also grown, in the Cameron Highlands.
• Malaysians have the highest number of Facebook friends, in the world, on average

What To See in Malaysia?

Malaysia is one of the most developed countries in Asia. A gentle introduction to Asia, a continent where cultural differences can feel overwhelming at first. It's very easy to travel in, most of the signage is in English. and is generally safe. (The FCO advice makes most countries sound highly risky.) As always, look after belongings, there is petty theft, if not much reported violence. Stay aware of the political situation. And note that Islamic insurgents have indulged in kidnappings off the remoter islands of Sabah.

This country is known for its gorgeous beaches, lush forests and historic cities teeming with colonial buildings and ornate temples.

• Read about my mainland travels here.
• Or go to Sabah in search of long houses, stilt villages, coral islands, Mount Kinabalu and the orang-utans.
• Or Sarawak for more tropical forest, orang-utans, monkeys and national parks and the fascinating city of Kuching.

Kuala Lumpur, Capital of Malaysia

I am pleased to report that I am back in pampered hotel land, from Indonesia. My hotel in Kuala Lumpur, the capital of Malaysia, only has a five kitchen café this time, but it still does a buffet. And I can see the Petronas Towers, dominating the skyline, as always, from my window. Though I’m not sure how sensitive it is of the Malaysians to refer to them as 'the tallest twin towers still in existence'.

KL has definitely changed since I was here last - ten years ago. (Read about KL and Borneo here.) Many more skyscrapers and when I venture out I might mistake this for the UK, or possibly the USA. The busy mall opposite is very up market - Chopard, Tod’s - although there are also McDonalds and M & S. It’s five minutes’ walk, but the hotel runs a buggy service there. In Malaysia, the people don’t like walking and they love shopping. The guide tells me they select hotels based on their proximity to the malls. He also tells me they are thinking about building drive-in mosques, where you don’t even have to get out of your car. I’m not sure if that was a joke or not.

Malacca, Malaysia

It is still de rigueur, however, to shorten city names in Malaysia. Kuala Lumpur is KL and Joha Baru JB and so on. I’m off to Malacca today, which they can’t shorten, but they do spell it Melaka. I think it will be a gentle jaunt through some rural scenes and I can take photos. The road is a three-lane highway, indistinguishable from the M1 most of the way (except for the palm trees and the lack of road works). After two hours, the driver says he will take me the last stretch in to town by the country route, which turns out to be a two-lane highway. The weather pattern is currently sunshine in the morning and rain in mid-afternoon I’m informed. What countryside there is, is swathed in haze. This is blamed on the Indonesian forest fires, where they are burning the indigenous trees to plant oil palm oil.

Malacca has a very interesting history. It was first a fishing village and then the location of one of the earliest Malay sultanates. The area was inhabited by Malays and Indians, amongst others and utilised by first the Siamese and then the Chinese, as a trading base. It prospered, in control of major trade routes, especially with Arabia, India and China.

This all changed, when when the Portuguese conquered Malacca in 1511. Rather than achieving dominion over the network the Portuguese, had instead managed to disrupt it significantly. Malacca changed hands to the Dutch (far more concerned with the east Indies) and then, to the British in 1824, (first by the British East India Company and then as a crown colony). After the dissolution of this crown colony, Malacca (along with Penang) became part of the Malayan Union on 1 April 1946. There are still the remains of the old Portuguese fort to see. The head of state is called the Yang di-Pertua Negeri or Governor, rather than a Sultan. (Great name.)

Exploring Malacca

Malacca City is lovely. More how I had expected China to be. Maybe they are just better at renovating here. The capital of Malacca State is divided by Jonker Street and ornately decorated gates invite us in. Chinatown is also replete with quaint antique shops, merchants’ houses, old craft workshops and a night market.

Then, there are the colourful religious buildings. coexisting peacefully. The seventeenth-century Chinese Cheng Hoon Teng temple has ornate decorations and multiple prayer halls. And the green, three-tiered roof on the eighteenth-century, Kampung Kling Mosque. Not to mention the beautifully decorated trishaws. Tricycle rickshaws are stationed on all the street corners. The more competitive drivers have smothered theirs with artificial flowers. One even has spinning windmills and an inbuilt music system. Singapore in miniature, but probably with more character. Back in my room, I’m passing on dinner tonight. I’m still full of buffet from yesterday.

Cameron Highlands

It’s all very easy here, too. Everything in Malaysia is written in English - most things are very English. It's Asia for beginners. There’s a national day looming soon – August 31st and the flags are coming out. Why don’t we have one? The flag of Malaysia looks to be an Islamic version of the stars and stripes.

I am driven into the Cameron Highlands. It’s a very posh little SUV, but even this has hardly any leg room. Everything is made for tiny people - Lilliputian. More motorways, complete with English style service areas, including Dunkin Donuts and KFC. Though a bit of Asian bazaar does creep in, with some tourist tat and some very glittery versions of Claire's Accessories. The last part of the route today is indeed rural and winds continually and nauseatingly for over an hour up into the clouds.

The Cameron Highlands are Malaysia's first real tourist area. The table land is 800-1600 metres above sea level, Named after geologist and explorer, William Cameron the plateau is noted for tea plantations. It's also (relatively) cool and pretty with waterfalls, rivers and lakes.

Tea plantations, so velvety green they are begging to be stroked. And little towns straggling the backs of ridges with timbered architecture that could almost be Scottish, except that the effect is more Super 8 Motel. It’s parky enough to be Scotland, a bit of a shock to the system.

I wander into the nearest town. Strawberry farms are the order of the day: Healthy Strawberries, Biggest Red Strawberries, all sorts of strawberry confections, as well as the golf course and the Ramadan Market. It's Ramadan at the moment, and folk flock round the stalls to buy food treats, after dusk. The newspapers have reported at least one death already from eating like this. The other hot news is that Golden Churn butter has been deemed to be non Halal and Muslims are ordered not to eat it. It contains pig’s DNA.

The Epitome of Colonial England

The hotel is ‘the epitome of colonial England’, all wood panelling, afternoon tea and log fires. There's a delightful dining room, the windows festooned with strings of white lights. It’s a shame my bedroom hasn’t got a log fire too. Though it has got a huge four poster bed, so it’s quite cosy.

The staff here all call me Miss Susan. Very deferential - I think. It’s the first time this trip I’ve actually stopped and done nothing, or very little anyway. I read in bed for a while and then I spend the rest of the morning in the spa. As tea and strawberries are the local specialties they feature heavily. I am supposed to have a relaxing tea bath. (Another first.) It looks great, with rose petals and chrysanthemums floating on the water. There is a tray resting over the bath that contains sugar scrub for my body, tea scrub for my face, lime slices for my elbows and knees and a tea bag for my eyes). There are even headphones to wear, if you like repetitive plastic music. Then I have a brilliant body scrub and a very long massage. Well, after that I am really good for nothing.

Jim Thompson Mystery Walk

However, I crawl out to do the Jim Thompson Mystery Walk, later on in the afternoon. I should have learned by now that in Asia the word walk is synonymous with sliding down narrow, muddy rainforest tracks, whilst simultaneously trying to avoid being garrotted by tree roots growing across the path. There is only me and a guide, exploring the Mossy Forest. (It's deemed to be the oldest forest in Malaysia -around 200 million years.) To add to the enjoyment, it starts to rain and he issues us with plastic ponchos. So there we are like two pixies tottering around. The terrain necessitates him holding my hand quite a lot.

The secondary forest here is being eroded, as the wood is deemed useless and all the rare orchids superfluous. The land is being developed for palm oil or apartments. A giant oak tree has fallen across our path and the guide suggests a long detour. I demur as I don’t want to prolong the excitement (especially the hand holding) and we hack our way through. Then I collect a leech, which is another first. The little bugger takes more than a sample test tube’s worth. The blood’s still trickling down my leg.

The Story of Jim Thompson

The guide also tells me a very long and complicated story about Jim Thompson. I have only previously associated him with restaurants that sell Thai food and his house/museum near Bangkok. An ex-architect, a retired army officer, hotelier, a one-time spy, a silk merchant and a renowned collector of antiques, Time magazine claimed he "almost singlehanded(ly) saved Thailand's vital silk industry from extinction". However, it seems he disappeared from the bungalow up the road here one afternoon in 1967 and never came back. The story involved communists, hordes of local witnesses, assassinations and the CIA and was far more involved than the one I have just perused on Wikipedia. Quite exciting though.

Visiting the Tea Plantations of Malaysia

Yesterday's’' exertions and massage certainly had an effect. I slept for over eleven hours last night. When I finally emerge from breakfast I get a taxi to take me up the mountain, through the tea plantations. The driver is a happy little soul. Ignoring the extra £12 he has extorted from me for going up the mountain, he complains all the way about the state of the road (it isn’t great, but might have qualified as an A road in Indonesia).

Then, he goes on to say that it is a waste of money going up the mountain anyway as it is always cloudy. (It is a bit cloudy, but I do get a view). Next, he starts on the tea pickers’ rickety wooden houses, saying how dirty and horrible they are. He says he used to be a tea picker and it was awful work. (It’s mostly mechanised round here now). I wonder if he makes much money taxi driving, as he obviously didn’t want this commission, even though he is being paid by the hour.

“You go back to hotel now? Good.”

Nevertheless, the plantations are stunning. (Far more picturesque than any I have seen in India, Sri Lanka or China). I visit the famous BOH plantation for a quick look at the ancient sorting machinery, much to my driver's disgust.

It is raining again this afternoon, so I have no choice. I have to head back to the spa.

Penang

I pulled this morning. A retired Aussie cattle rancher, who has had some kind of stroke, asked me to go out for the day with him. His wife is ill in bed and wasn’t consulted. But I have to leave for Penang. This state, part on an island, part on the Malay peninsula, was founded by Captain Francis Light, together, with its capital city of George Town, in 1786. ( His son, William founded Adelaide in Australia). It's an uneventful drive to the island, over (what was) the longest bridge in Asia (13.5 km). Driving reminds me that I forgot to mention the incursion of Tesco. The stores are everywhere - all sizes. The locals seem very proud of them.

E and O Hotel, Penang

I was really looking forward to this hotel in Georgetown and it has lived up to its promise. It’s even more colonial than the last one, marble, palm trees and white shutters. A four page cocktail list. I decide it looks like a smaller version of Raffles in Singapore. Then I find out that it was built by the same people - the Sarkies brothers - so not really surprising. The E and O Hotel boasts it has an Otis lift, which is one of the oldest operating in Asia. I am not as impressed by this information as the hotel intended. I have been stuck in lifts before.

My room is palatial. I have a sitting room with orchids, a bedroom and a huge bathroom with two sinks. There’s even a duck to float in my bath and brass switches, one of which is the call button for the butler. I’m terrified I’ll press it by mistake. The window looks out over the sea and the swimming pool. It’s good to be back in the balmy heat of the lowlands, but it is pretty humid. I open my window and within 30 seconds all the mirrors have steamed up. (Not, I regretfully hasten to say, because there is any action going on). The service is assiduous, if not obsequious. Though I still grapple with some hotel customs. Here are my questions:

• Why is there always a telephone next to the toilet? Is that where people finalise business deals or is it where most emergencies happen? (Valiantly trying to avoid any bad taste puns here.)
• I have expounded before on the need to fold points into the end of the toilet roll. Why? I’d rather my tissue was untouched by human hand thanks.
• Why do they always call at six pm to turn down the bed? Isn’t that when everyone has a shower before dinner? And why do they have to turn down the bed anyway? I can think of a lot of things I’d rather have help with than getting into bed.
• Why does the person who calls to service the room always ring when you are on the toilet? And why do they not hear you shout, 'Please leave my room till later?'
• Then there’s air conditioning, though that’s not limited to hotels. Why is it always set so you feel as if you’re sitting in a refrigerator? We’re always getting nagged to lower the thermostat a degree or two at home. If they increased all the air conditioning settings worldwide by 10 degrees it would crack global warming instantly.

Breakfast is absolutely sumptuous, on the veranda, with the boats sailing by. You’re probably sick of me going on about food by now. This dining room has juice made to order from every fruit imaginable. I eat some sushi – and I’m still contemplating the chicken curry and the also made to order Asian soups and stir fries. Maybe tomorrow.

Georgetown, Penang

Then I ‘do’ Georgetown. Light named Georgetown after George III and developed it, as an entrepot, a port for importing and then exporting more or less the same goods. It developed rapidly, but eventually gave way to Singapore, in terms of importance. First impressions are that it is less colourful than Malacca, but I soon realise that’s it’s actually more authentic. It's a really excellent and rewarding place to explore.

Like Singapore, there's a Little India and a Chinatown. It isn’t too obviously touristy, with all the locals going about their business. Little India, for example, is full of saree shops, curry stalls and Hindu temple offerings for sale. I wander down Harmony Street, where there are temples, mosques and churches of all persuasions, coexisting happily together. Then, past all the British colonial buildings and the fort.

Far too many Chinese Temples for me to admire today, beckon. They demonstrate clearly the domination of the Chinese people here. The Goddess of Mercy Temple in Pitt Street, Penang's oldest Tao (and Buddhist) temple (1728), the Hock Teik Cheng Sin Tao Temple, in Armenia Street and the Han Jiang Ancestral Tao Temple, to name just three. One has a sign ‘It is forbidden to roll the granite ball in the lion’s mouth’. I hadn’t even thought about doing that, until I saw the notice. The Khoo Kongsi, with its magnificent gilt decoration, is is the grandest clan temple in the country. It is also. I understand one of the city's major historic attractions My route home takes me past the Christian cemetery. The Chinese name for it is ‘place for people with red hair’

It also seems that there are even more celebrations going on or imminent. The newspapers and shops are full of them. Not only is it National Independence Day this month (Merdeka), it is Malaysia Day next month, when Sabah and Sarawak joined the union. (Singapore did too, but we won’t mention that.) It’s Ramadan the whole of this month and Eidhilfutr (spelled every way you can think of in the papers) or Hari Raya the whole of next month of course. And for the Chinese it’s the Festival of the Hungry Ghosts for a month. They have to leave out a lot of food to feed all the family ancestors, so there are banquets and food of all kinds in the temples.

Back at base I lounge by the swimming pool. A little man asks me if I want a foot massage and it seems churlish to refuse.

North Penang

I have resolved to lodge a stiff complaint with the hotel management. My duck will only float on its side. Now I shall have to seek some other amusement.

Management turn out to be otherwise engaged today. They are filming the final of Asian MasterChef here and there are cameras and film crew (who all look about 16) everywhere. They are posing little groups of Asian beauties on all the staircases. The bar is full of slightly older Chinese men talking about Nigella Lawson as if they know her intimately. I haven’t seen her yet. We have to take a very circuitous route to breakfast. Then a very arduous day. I take the hotel shuttle bus up to the sister hotel in the north of the island and sunbathe by the pool there. I stroll on Batu Ferringhi Beach, but there are jelly fish warning signs and no-one (unsurprisingly) is in the water. Then I come back and sunbathe by the pool here.

Getting to Langkawi Island, Malaysia

Off to Langkawi Island today, for my last four sleeps. I can’t believe how quickly the time has gone by. I am flying, from Penang, instead of taking the ferry, because the travel agent told me to. I've been told the sea can be uncomfortably rough here, so hopefully this is the best option. It is chaotic at the airport, as they are building a new terminal. I can see why as I am waiting for my flight; it is raining (despite the rule about it only being allowed to rain in the afternoon) and water is dripping through the roof onto my head.

Maybe the flying wasn’t such a great decision. We take off. The illumination on the seat belt sign pings off and the stewardess throws us a packet of peanuts. Immediately afterwards they announce it is time to land. Great, short flight I think. But we don’t land, because there is bad weather in Langkawi. there is even more illegal rain there too, which isn’t great either for the plane or for my holiday prospects. We circle for a while and I start to worry about us running out of fuel. That is obviously on the captain’s mind too as we then fly back to Penang. We wait half an hour and then take off yet again. Everything is played out in rewind, but this time we actually arrive.

Staying in Langkawi

The resort is very different to my last hotels in Malaysia, but a perfect place to finish. It’s ultra-modern: big white umbrellas and infinity pools. The view is gorgeous, a string of little islands across the bay. It’s really pretty at night with the swimming pools and trees all lit up, very romantic..... And there are about 20 really posh little villas. The hotel calls them ultra-luxurious. They have their own swimming pool, massage area and staff quarters.

My room is lovely. There is a huge TV set into half a wall (honestly). It's a shame there’s nothing, on except bad Australian movies or the fighting in Libya. Anyway, back to the hotel and cocktails. There’s a martini bar and a mojito bar. What’s more there’s a free martini every night. This must be what heaven’s like. It’s just a shame that it’s still bucketing down and the forecast for the next four days says heavy rain.

Around Langkawi

More excitement: thunderstorms all night and a power cut this morning. I’m also covered in incredibly itchy sand fly bites. So much for a tropical paradise. There is still a sprinkle of rain this morning, so I saunter into town. It’s a duty free island and to be honest, some of it looks like the hypermarket area near Calais. There are heaps of fake clothes and handbags. I am quite excited by the bags until I realise that they aren’t even copy designs. Similar items are labelled Jimmy Choo, Mulberry, and so on. Even if I had wanted to make a purchase it would have been difficult. Ramadan seems to be taking a toll on the shop assistants. Most of them are asleep under the counters.

The highlight for me is watching a troop of monkeys make a raid on a deserted bar. They swarm across the trees and slide down the telegraph poles much faster than firemen. Then they turn over all the bins and even remove half full glasses of juice (or cocktails?) Perching out of reach they scoop the liquid out with their paws. Many of the macaques are mothers with babies, who crawl out from their fur beds and sit on their mum’s backs to watch the fun and beg a bite or two. When it is all over, they return via the telegraph poles, the mothers stuffing the babies back into their furry stomachs before they vault up into the trees.

The rain holds off enough for more sunbathing and then the hotel lays on unlimited free cocktails and canapés to make up for the power cut. So I don’t need to buy any dinner. And I have a very nice half hour’s flirtation with a much too young Dutch hotel manager. He is avoiding having to speak to other hotel guests and I have had too much to drink on an empty stomach.

 I shall close my diary, do my packing and watch the rain!

Read more about Malaysia here.

Malaysia - KL and KK

Barbara and I decide to travel to Malaysia on a last minute whim. We just book a flight to Kuala Lumpur and then another to Kota Kinabalu, in Sabah, a state in Borneo and back, when we get there. Then we realise we can visit Singapore as well, get all excited and alter our return booking.

Barbara has friends living on the outskirts of Kuala Lumpur. We are soon talking about KL and KK, as they are known here, like proper ex-pats.

Kuala Lumpur, the Capital of Malaysia

Kuala Lumpur is the capital city and the cultural, financial, and economic centre of Malaysia. It is also home to the Parliament of Malaysia, and the Istana Negara, the official residence of the Yang di-Pertuan Agong (monarch of Malaysia). They relocated some of the capital 's functions to purpose built Putrajaya, a little way to the south. Kuala Lumpur started life servicing tin mines in the mid nineteenth century.

Kuala Lumpur is, apparently one of the leading cities in the world for tourism. I'm sorry, I don't understand why. The Petronas Towers dominate the city. Once you're up there on the walkway joining the two towers, you can see all there is to see. It's not very exciting. A few scrapers and oddments of buildings, malls, mosques, older shop house blocks and out to the hills.

Shopping, yes, that's a different matter. There are huge malls here. And plenty of open shops, lining the main streets. A surprising number of these sell shiny hair accessories. And there are street markets and stalls, everywhere, of course.

Exploring KL

The most interesting sights, other than the Petronas Towers, are the colonial heritage buildings. Probably the most well known is the Moorish style Sultan Abdul Samad Building, a late-nineteenth century building in front of the Dataran Merdeka (Independence Square) It was the headquarters of the offices of the British colonial administration; then, it was known simply as Government Offices. After Malaysian independence, it was renamed after Sultan Abdul Samad, the reigning sultan of Selangor at the time of construction. It has since housed various Malaysian government offices.

The National Textile Museum is eye-catching with its stripes. and even the Railways Station is splendid, with Indian style domes and cupolas. There're also numerous other museums, some temples and plenty of mosques. Islam is the state religion and the most well known mosque is the blue roofed National Mosque of Malaysia (Masjid Negara)

Sabah - in a Nutshell

• Sabah is the most northerly of two Malaysian states of Malaysia in Borneo, the third largest island in the world..
• Located just above the Equator, Sabah is famous for its tropical rainforests, abundant with animal and plant species. There is a long mountain range on the western side - Mount Kinabalu is also the highest point of Malaysia.
• The earliest human settlement in Sabah can be traced back to 20,000–30,000 years ago. The state has had a long standing trading relationship with China, dating back to the fourteenth century AD. Sabah came under the influence of the Bruneian Empire in the fourteenth and fifteenth centuries, but was subsequently acquired by the British North Borneo Chartered Company in the nineteenth century. Following the three year Japanese occupation in World War II, Sabah became a British Crown Colony in 1946. Self governance followed, in1963, and Sabah became one of the founding members of the Federation of Malaysia later that year.
• The state government system is closely modelled on the Westminster parliamentary system and the head of state is the governor. Under the Malaysian constitution, Sabah has greater autonomy than the states in Peninsular Malaysia.
• Malay is the official language of the state and Islam is the state religion, but other religions are accepted.

Kota Kinabalu, Capital of Sabah, Borneo

Malaysia is unexpectedly orderly compared to much of Asia. And very British - roads, signs. language. Kota Kinabalu is easily reached and we find an affordable central hotel, without too much hassle. This is the capital city of Sabah, a Malaysian state, atop the island of Borneo. There are plenty of locals willing to help us travel across the island , on surprisingly comfortable and punctual buses.

But first we need to explore KK. It is an easy city to navigate and wander, observing life on the water in the stilt village and sampling the many eateries.

KK is also blessed with the five nearby islands of Tunku Abdul Rahman Park (TARP). Two islands, Sapi and Manukan Islands are accessible by ferry (only 15 - 30 minutes) or other private boats from the waterfront. With their picture perfect beaches, picturesque, casuarina trees and azure water, they're ideal for snorkelling, sunbathing, and swimming, or just doing nothing. Sapi is the least frequented of the pair, so we are well organised, and take a picnic lunch with us. Monkeys creep down from the trees and steal it while we’re in the water. The beach is strewn with empty bags and peel and we are exceedingly hungry by the time the boat turns up to fetch us home.

Mount Kinabalu

Then, we 're off touring. Kinabalu Park, ninety miles away, and home to Mount Kinabalu, the highest mountain in south east Asia. is a must-see. It's one of those compulsory, get up before dawn climbs. To escape the heat and view the sunrise. Barbara is appalled at the idea. Especially as we are told we need a guide and may suffer altitude sickness. (4,095 metres). It's a very prominent point, rising steeply from sea level. So, instead, we walk up some way savouring the jungle paths. It’s still the wet season and it’s too misty to enjoy much of a view, in any case.

Beyond this protected marine park, Sabah has several other ecologically significant marine parks and islands including Tun Sakaran Marine Park (off Semporna), Turtle Islands (off Sandakan), Pulau Tiga Park (off Papar), and Tun Mustapha Marine Park (off Kudat).

Sepilok Orang Utan Sanctuary, Sabah

Now, crossing the island of Borneo until we are almost on the east coast. Tiny Sepilok village is famous for its Orang Utan Sanctuary, where abandoned or orphaned orang-utans are rehabilitated and then released back into the wild. Everyone wants to see an orang utan. There are platforms where they are fed (so we can see) and the endangered great apes dutifully swing along lines strung through the trees, perform acrobatics and queue up for fruit. There are three species of orang-utan, found only in Borneo and Sumatra (Indonesia). They are the heaviest animals to live in trees, and they build nests.

Getting to Selignan Island

Sandakan is the obvious stop over after seeing the orang-utans. This port is also the obvious jumping off point for Selingan Island, home of the hawkesbill and green turtle centre. The boat leaves at 10 and takes an hour. It returns at seven (ouch) the next day. Our hotel is near the beach where we have easy access to the turtle sanctuary. Both Green and Hawksbill turtles visit Selingan Island throughout the year to nest, in different seasons.  We're here for the hawksbills (February to April).

Selignan Island and Saving the Turtles of Sabah

Female turtles claw their way up the beach searching for a nesting site at night. If they are disturbed in the process they just run away, back to sea. They dig a deep hole, with their flippers and deposit anything 40-200 eggs. Finally, she tries to disguise the nest. before returning to the ocean. It's hard work.

The Sanctuary workers remove the eggs, tag and incubate them in special pits. That takes 50-60 days. Still very tiny, the hatchlings are released back into the sea. We help turn buckets of tiny turtles, legs waving, onto the sand, and watch as they scuttle towards the sea. It’s heart-wrenching.

We run around waving our arms hoping to ward off any predatory birds and then watch them struggle into the waves. Very few survive according to David Attenborough. Only 1 in 1,000 escape the predatory birds and fish. Our guide tells us that the sanctuary‘s job is to guard the nests, remove the eggs after they’re laid and protect and incubate them. He adds that the employees are often offered hefty bribes to sell the eggs. So frustratingly sad.

Back at KK, we sample cocktails at the glitzy beachside hotels we can’t afford to reside in.

Singapore next and then back to KL, to fly home.

Read more about Malaysia here.